There is a ‘reverse' stigma associated with being in a relationship - a stigma connotes a bad sign, so I propose that a reverse stigma is something that connotes a good sign. Following this logic, when a person is in a relationship it’s viewed as a a sign of health, a sign of getting along, it communicates to society that you are ‘normal.” As an aside, when reviewing case studies of psychopaths, you hear profilers say ‘he appeared normal, he was married/had a girlfriend.‘ We of course know that being in a relationship is oftentimes far from being an indication of health or wellbeing*.
Ironically the ‘real’ stigma (the bad sign) associated with being unattached tells us that it’s an indication that there is something wrong with a person, that they must be antisocial, they must have a disease, they are surely undesirable and certainly unlovable. This is an irony whose very wrong but yet powerful message keeps us tethered to toxic people and embroiled in dysfunctional relationships by nothing but a big fat lie.
What’s even sadder is that many unattached individuals internalize this message of being less than if unattached and make themselves crazy trying to find a partner, at all costs: at the cost of their pride, their self-esteem, their spirit and sometimes their lives. Start looking for the runway now. Go. Don’t buy this sham for another minute.
*(A 2005 study reported that 7% of partnered Canadian women experienced violence at the hands of a spouse between 1999 and 2004. Of these battered women, nearly one-quarter (23%) reported being beaten, choked, or threatened with a knife or gun. (Family Violence in Canada: A Statistical Profile, 2005))
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