Control is an interesting thing. While for the most part we want it for ourselves to help us feel safe, we are actually more likely to give it away or allow someone to take it from us.
In an abusive relationship it’s all about control -- them dominating and controlling you.
“Domestic violence and abuse are used for one purpose and one purpose only: to gain and maintain total control over you. An abuser doesn’t “play fair.” Abusers use fear, guilt, shame, and intimidation to wear you down and keep you under his or her thumb. Your abuser may also threaten you, hurt you, or hurt those around you.
Domestic violence and abuse does not discriminate. It happens among heterosexual couples and in same-sex partnerships. It occurs within all age ranges, ethnic backgrounds, and economic levels. And while women are more commonly victimized, men are also abused—especially verbally and emotionally, although sometimes even physically as well. The bottom line is that abusive behavior is never acceptable, whether it’s coming from a man, a woman, a teenager, or an older adult. You deserve to feel valued, respected, and safe.” http://www.helpguide.org/mental/domestic_violence_abuse_types_signs_causes_effects.htm
The most important thing to remember is that there are ways to take control back, just a little bit, just the tiniest little bit will allow you to:
MAKE A PLAN: http://www.healthyplace.com/abuse/break-free/escape-plan-to-get-away-from-domestic-violence/
STAY SAFE.
LEAVE.
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